Helen Cummings, who is 2014 Newcastle Woman of the Year, went public with her memoir Blood Vows, and believes talking about domestic violence helps to stop the conspiracy of silence surrounding the abuse.

In 2011, she released her book describing the six years she spent fearing for her life at the hands of her abusive husband, Stuart Wynter,a respected doctor in a country town, who later killed his new wife, child and himself.

Ms Cummings said it was a loving and understanding family and especially the good men in her life - father, brother, sister's boyfriends - who protected her from her estranged husband in the early part of her new life.

"It's not about me any more but about highlighting the plight of women," she said.

Ms Cummings encouraged women in domestic violence situations to tell someone.

"Open up a little bit - it shouldn't be a hidden secret."

Her advice to others was call it out when they heard and saw it.

She said not all conversations had to be personal.

"Start it in the workplace with 'Did you see about the White Ribbon breakfast?"'

To her, the breakfast honoured good men - every day men not just celebrities - who stood up for women and children by taking the oath to put a stop to violence against women.

■ Go to whiteribbon.org.au to take the oath and find ways to join the conversation.